I just got a call from my old man.
And yeah, he always called me at least once a day, just to check what am i doing, am i doing good or just wasting my time endlessly.
He always sent me texts. The typical texts that're containing advices and such. Reminding me not to waste time, telling me to study hard, be a good girl, don't ever cheat on exam (i'll never do that, pa), et cetera et cetera.
I am very grateful for that. Thanks Allah for sending me such a great father.
He told me to pray and after that, to study of course. After he said that he hung up right away.
Okay, i did everything he told me to do.
Firstly, I prayed.
And..
I cried.
Yeah, cried.
I am regretting my acts (yeah, regret always comes later)
I cried silently. I dont want anyone knows that i cried, even my family.
Yha, i'm a silent type of person. I would never let my family knows if i cried. I always put up a smile over my face whatever happens.
The reason why i cried is
I realize that,
literally.. I am suck at everything.
Yas, Everything.
Hah? everything?
Ya, semuanya, maksudku.. di sekolahan misalnya.
I am no good at almost all subjects,
I am not a social butterfly.
Tapi itu tidak berarti aku socially awkward person,
I'm just.. a socially normal person(?)
And i need someone who'll listen to everything i blurt out.
I am a Phlegmatist. I am a listener. I listen to everyone's problem who want to tell their stories to me. And i gave them feedbacks.
That doesnt mean i don't have problems, and i don't need someone to listen to me.
A listener does have problems. And the problem is.. They don't have someone to listen to their problems.
The only one they have to listen to their problem is their own self.
Melihat sekitar, banyak orang bersahabat, dan melihat persahabatan mereka yang begitu indah(?) membuatku sedikit iri.
Aku tidak percaya adanya sahabat,, atau yang biasa disebut bestfriend. Ya, karena bestfriend only apply to 'one' person.
Okay, just in case you guys are having arguments to my statement above.. The statement above is in my case.
Hm, sebenernya ini draft yg udh lama kesimpen. Ketimbang disimpen mending dipublish aih.